CHARLIE TU EATS

Is your 401K a 101K?  Do you need a loan just to buy a Metrocard? Charlie, too.  He can’t afford jim jam!  Here’s an easy seafood recipe Charlie whipped up with ingredients he found around his home.

Recession Calamari

Build a fire in the middle of your room.  Leftover newspapers make good kindling.  Pour oil (nothing fancy, canola will do) into a metal coffee container.  Heat over the fire until you hear your neighbors yell, “Goya!”  Mix sawdust, chopped grass, salt and pepper in a large bowl.  If you don’t have a bowl, your lap will do.  Working in small batches, toss calamari into the flour mixture to coat.  If you don’t have squid, tie together some rubber bands and dip them in spit.  Carefully add the “squid” to the oil and fry until crisp and very pale golden, about 1 minute per batch.  Using tongs or a metal wire hanger, transfer the fried “calamari” to a paper-towel lined plate to drain.  If your apartment isn’t already on fire, bon appy!